How to cope with downsizing your home
Moving into a retirement community is an exciting new chapter, but downsizing can feel like upsizing on stress. Here’s how to successfully navigate the change and enjoy the transition.
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28 April 2025
Stories
| Retirement Living
Moving into a retirement community can start a wonderful new chapter in your life. It offers the opportunity to enjoy a friendly, like-minded community, participate in social activities and make the most of beautifully maintained communal areas. Best of all, you can leave behind the hard work of home maintenance and have more time for the things you love.
But how to cope with downsizing your home, both emotionally and practically, is something many retirees find challenging. In this article, we talk about how to navigate the emotional challenges attached to the downsizing process and moving into a retirement living community. We’ve even included some insights from people who know a thing or two about it – a few of our BaptistCare retirement living residents.
Key takeaways
- Embrace downsizing as an exciting new chapter in your life
- Savour the memories and give yourself time to adjust
- Get the physical and emotional support you need
The emotional challenges of downsizing
While moving house can be one of life’s great adventures, it’s also one of the most emotionally and physically demanding. When it involves downsizing, those feelings can intensify. It might feel less like simplifying your life and more like upsizing the stress. The mix of excitement and uncertainty is completely normal.
Navigating change
The anxiety you might feel about moving into a retirement living community may come about because you are navigating so much change. Downsizing into a retirement living community often represents a giant step into the unknown, which can be daunting all on its own. When it’s prompted by a significant life event, it can feel overwhelming, so it’s completely normal to feel uncertain or uneasy.
Attachment to memories
You might also feel sad about leaving your old life behind.
BaptistCare resident, Elsie lived in her home on the NSW South Coast for 50 years. It was filled with furniture her husband had made which obviously held huge sentimental value. “I thought I’d never leave that house,” she says.
While she lived in it for five years after her husband died, as time went on, more work needed doing on it. “Eventually, I became really sad living there,” she says.
Guilt
If moving involves a downsizing process, you’ll have to fit everything you want to take with you into a smaller space. This usually translates to parting with belongings and sentimental items, some of which may also hold treasured memories. You might feel both sad and guilty about not being able to take them with you, particularly if nobody else seems to want them.
Learning how to cope with downsizing your home means being gentle with yourself during this process. Letting go of meaningful possessions is hard, but it doesn’t erase the memories associated with them.
Stress and anxiety
But the above are only a few of the reasons you might feel stressed and anxious about moving. There may be a whole host of others. Moving will certainly disrupt your routine. It will also mean a new chapter in your life, and adjusting to new people and places. There will be many decisions to be made. The logistics alone – packing, planning, organising the paperwork – can make the process seem like climbing a mountain.
You might also feel you’re at a point of no return, that you’re ending a significant phase of your life, and this can bring on feelings of loss or reflection about ageing and life transitions. All these things can translate to an extremely emotional experience.
Ways to emotionally cope with downsizing
Downsizing your home often comes with a complex mix of emotions: excitement for a fresh start, sadness over what’s being left behind, and maybe even anxiety about the unknown. It’s a deeply personal experience, and it’s okay to feel a little overwhelmed.
Learning how to emotionally cope with downsizing isn’t just about managing logistics--it’s about honouring your memories, giving yourself space to adjust, and embracing the possibilities ahead. Here are a few gentle strategies to help you move through the transition with confidence, self-compassion, and support.
Embrace the journey
Try framing the downsizing process as a new and exciting beginning. There’s a sense of freedom in letting go of the past and stepping into a new chapter.
To ease the transition, spend time at your new retirement living community can make a big difference when figuring out how to cope with downsizing your home emotionally. If possible, visit your new home and meet some of your new neighbours. Take note of everything you like about it and imagine yourself living there. Familiarity can help make the move feel more positive and empowering.
Noel found BaptistCare Kintyre Living Village when he saw a sign on the highway near Dubbo Zoo. “I drove in and was very impressed with the openness, the gardens, the distance between the homes,” he says.
On another visit, he went to the office and was shown a home. “I said to the CEO, ‘I could live here’,” he recalls.
Noel knew it would be hard to say goodbye to his home, but from the moment he put down his deposit, he was very positive. “I’ve never regretted it,” he says.
Acknowledge your emotions
It can be hard to deal with change and harder to say goodbye to the life you’ve known. In some ways, it would be unusual if you found it easy! You might feel a range of emotions, from sadness, grief, anxiety, and even anger, to happiness and excitement. Everyone responds differently, but whatever you're feeling, it’s important to acknowledge your emotions and give yourself time to adjust.
Take time to savour the memories
Celebrate all your past home has given you. Consider having a formal farewell – a final catch-up with neighbours or a quiet cup of tea alone on the veranda. Elsie decided to have a small celebration before leaving her former home. “We just had a cheesecake from The Cheesecake Shop,” she says.
If you start feeling sad while packing up, try turning your attention to an area of your home that doesn’t feel embedded with poignant memories – perhaps the laundry! Or do something that takes your mind off things for a while – take a walk, phone a friend, or put on a podcast.
“Try not to hold onto the past too tightly,” Elsie advises. “Look forward to the new chapter in your life.”
Get the help you need
You will need help – physically and emotionally. Don’t be afraid to ask for it.
Approach friends, family members, neighbours and your wider community for help with planning, sorting and packing. If you can, hire professional removalists for the big day.
In Elsie’s case, her son helped her prepare her house for sale and went through her husband’s things. Friends and family members were also on hand to sort through sentimental items and belongings.
It’s also okay to lean on people who care about you for emotional support, and share your feelings with people you trust. If you’re finding it very hard to cope though, don’t hesitate to seek professional help.
Overcome the guilt
One of the hardest emotional hurdles when learning how to cope with downsizing your home is the guilt of parting with family heirlooms. What do you do with Pop’s carvings, or the silver spoons passed through generations?
You could pass special items on to family members or friends who will treasure them. Elsie says, “Family members chose what they wanted, and I let go of the rest.”
She also decided that one thing would represent all the sentimental items she couldn’t take with her. “On our 50th wedding anniversary, which happened to be the day my husband died, we took a photo of our joined hands. I took that with me to my new home.”
While some things carry deep sentimental meaning, others may simply be taking up space. For those, a more practical approach can help.
For things that have no sentimental value, BaptistCare retirement living resident Sharron says, “Look at everything you have and ask, ‘When was the last time I used that? When was the last time I wore that?’ If you can’t remember, you don’t need it.”
If you are looking for more practical guidance, check out our article on 3 helpful steps to make downsizing into a retirement village feel less overwhelming.
What Our Residents Learned About Downsizing
Sharron
One of the things that appealed most about retirement living to Sharron and her husband was the freedom to go away without worrying.
“We’d had a large house on an acre with three big sheds,” she says. “Downsizing to a BaptistCare retirement living community took a big load off our shoulders. Everything’s close by, and we have great neighbours.”
Feeling safe is another big plus. “If there’s ever an issue, all we have to do is push a button and someone will come to help.”
Her advice? Choose a property that suits you and, “As odd as it sounds, consider your physical size, if you’re tall or big-framed, a small space might not be comfortable.”
And don’t leave it too long. “We’re in our 60s and it took us 12 solid days of work to move. It would have been harder if we were older. Also, if you stay somewhere that doesn’t really work for you anymore, you are wasting your life.”
Noel
Noel and his wife had been married for 52 years when she passed away. He continued to live in the home they’d shared for more than 20 years, but loneliness eventually prompted him to think about moving to a retirement living community.
“I spent five years in the house on my own and the opportunity to participate in social activities was limited,” he says. “I really like people, I like doing things for people, so I had to make a choice about how I was going to live.”
Noel has now been at Kintyre for almost six years. “It suits me because it’s not a big area to maintain, but my furniture fits. I’ve always loved gardening, and I have 16 roses here.”
He says BaptistCare retirement living is friendly and keeping busy seems to be the secret to his successful transition. “The staff and social clubs organise different activities on a regular basis that get you out of the house. There are also several organised groups that go out for dinner. You can choose to go to or not. I participate in as many as I can. I also help out wherever I can. I like being useful.”
Elsie
Elsie lived with her daughter’s family for a while before making the decision to sell her house and buy a BaptistCare retirement living home.
Like Noel, her tips for people who are thinking about downsizing to move into a retirement living property include keeping busy and making new friends.
She set about doing this before buying she moved.
“I started with a walking group. I joined the Red Hats, I went to lunches. I have always had lots of family and friends, but I’ve never had as many as I now have.”
Her tip for people considering downsizing to move into retirement living is to really think about what is right for them.
“People will tell you what they think you should do. I decided what was right for me,” she says. “Moving here is even better than I expected. I’m so much happier.”
Making downsizing easy with BaptistCare
Choosing where and how to live as you age is a personal decision and often an emotional experience. You might wonder if now is the time to embrace retirement living, whether it’s time to let go of a larger home, or how to plan for greater peace of mind in the years ahead.
Exploring what’s on offer can provide the clarity you need to make the move that feels right for you.
In a previous article, we talked about the key benefits of living in a retirement living community. You can read it here: Five benefits of living in a retirement village
Decisions can be stressful. Selling the family home and moving into retirement living is a big one, but after that, it’s pretty easy with BaptistCare retirement living.
Decisions are easier here
What’s your idea of a fulfilling retired life?
Maybe it’s spending time in the garden – and not having to do the gardening.
Catching up with old friends or making new ones.
Decisions, decisions!
You’ll find they’re a lot easier with BaptistCare retirement living.
It’s time to embrace a lifestyle retirement that feels effortless.
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