How we work with men to help break the cycle of domestic and family violence
“How are the men going to know how to manage their own triggers, their own trauma, if they haven’t understood or had explained to them what’s actually happening with them?” asks BaptistCare HopeStreet Counsellor and Group Facilitator, Graham.
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05 March 2024
Stories
| HopeStreet, BaptistCare
“How are the men going to know how to manage their own triggers, their own trauma, if they haven’t understood or had explained to them what’s actually happening with them?” asks BaptistCare HopeStreet Counsellor and Group Facilitator, Graham.
This fundamental question underpins the Men’s Behavioural Change program, Facing Up, a program dedicated to breaking the cycle of domestic and family violence which Graham co-facilitates with fellow Counsellor and Group Facilitator, Wendy.
“It provides men with the opportunity to face up to their violent behaviour and its damaging impact on their ex/partners and children,” Graham said.
“The men in this program want to break the cycle of violence that’s been repeated in their family for generations. They realise that if they don’t change their violent behaviour, their sons and daughters are going to grow up thinking that this behaviour is okay - that’s the benchmark,” Wendy added.
The power of the group is that men can have conversations they can’t have anywhere else, in a non-judgemental environment.
Past participant, Mark, said the one thing he took away from the course was ‘choice’.
“My response to a situation is my own. My behaviours and actions are my own. And I can choose a better path, always with the knowledge that I have gained.”
Mark also attributed the program to helping him understand his emotions better. “To name them, be aware of them and just sit with them at times.
It has helped me to walk away from, or handle situations better where I’ve felt misunderstood, hurt, or unsafe and it has given me the ability to feel both my physical and emotional responses during difficult times.”
Long-term client, Josh, credited the program for making him a better father and partner, and recommended it for men challenged with abusive behaviour.
“The ‘Facing Up’ program is a really good program. You feel safe and it has really good counsellors to support and teach you better ways. It has taught me lots of new strategies and changed the person I was,” he said.
An important part of the 20-week program is to have both male and female facilitators.
“It’s a way of modelling how a man and a woman can relate to each other in a respectful and trusting way, and on an equal footing. A lot of the men don’t know what a respectful relationship looks like,” said Wendy.
Did you know that over the past year, BaptistCare HopeStreet has delivered 10,000 hours of counselling and group work?